Have you ever tried to rewire how you think? Everyone goes through that moment when they realize they want to change their habits or try to be a better person. I am going through that now. Here are a few things that have prompted this change to make the most out of life and be more positive.
Recently it was brought to my attention that I have road rage. Yes, sometimes I have a tendency to tell other drivers how they should drive and maybe sometimes my voice is raised to a level that some call yelling. Okay, so I had an issue with road rage. I decided that I didn’t want to be angry at other people anymore especially when they dont use the stick on the left that signals when they are turning 😉 How did I accomplish making this change? It takes constant repeating of a habit in order to make it stick, every time a driver cuts me off or slams on their brake, goes too slow or is texting and driving I ask myself why are you annoyed or angry about this? All they are doing is trying to get to their end point just like you and you don’t know what is going on in their world. Maybe someone just died or had a baby and are in a hurry to get there, maybe they simply just did not see you and didn’t mean to cut you off. It’s not always with a vicious intent. By changing this pattern and asking myself every time something happens why am I feeling this way, it has allowed an opportunity to be a happier driver and a happier person. By making this change I don’t spend every minute in the car yelling at other people when they do something wrong. It allows positivity and optimism to be my number one priority which drastically reduces the amount of negativity in my day to day life. I, like most of you, don’t want to spend half of my life or even a quarter of it being negative. I would rather spend most of my days happy and relaxed. Rewiring your brain to think a certain way will get you there.
I have exercised this practice in other parts of my life in the past few months as well and looking back on it now, I can see a drastic difference in my days. I am happier, lighter, positive and I also have much less judgement on myself and on others. My friends and I (including my husband) would love people watching and discussing ridiculous outfits or partner choices. Since rewiring how I think, the first thing I notice about a person is not how they are dressed or their size anymore and its a relief. I no longer wanted to be that bully who made fun of others or brought them down. So what if someone is wearing bring purple pants with a fanny pack, maybe that outfit makes them feel confident and by making fun of them we only bring them down. What if they are already having a bad day? You never know what is going on with someone unless you care enough to ask the questions. You might be the person putting the cherry on top of a terrible day. I knew that I no longer wanted to be that person.
My last opportunity for bettering myself that I will mention is when someone annoys me, especially my husband. When someone annoys you especially when it is your significant other, its a tendency to sit and stew and let it affect your mood for the rest of the day. Why? Instead of letting it get worse and getting even more annoyed that the other person hasn’t caught on that your upset, why not just ask yourself why am I feeling annoyed? Is it truly them or is it something I did? Did I allow myself to get annoyed over something that wasn’t a big deal or that the other person didn’t think was a big deal because I didn’t voice my opinion on the subject? By taking a moment to ponder why I feel the way I do, I have realized that I tend to overreact on some of the little things. Rewiring my thought process has allowed me to communicate more in my marriage and be happier.
It isn’t easy to do this but it is worth it in the end. I know personally I wanted to change the way I react when something happens or when something doesn’t go my way and squeeze the negativity out of my life. Of course there is still some, but it has reduced and has made room for more happiness in my life than I could imagine.